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EAT ā€˜Nā€™ GROW BARBIE

Stephanie Scarborough

 

What’s that dwarfing o’er the hill and o’er the dale?

Who raids the local burger grill and breaks the scale?

It’s Eat ‘n’ Grow Barbie from Mattel.

The more you feed her,

the more she’ll swell.

 

All Barbie haters unite; this is your chance to fight.

Take revenge with purge and binge.

Since it’s Barbie’s fault that

your life’s stinky,

            Why don’t you thank her with a Twinkie?

 

Plump her thighs with apple pies.

Once you’ve stuffed her all you can,

You’re still as fat as you began.

            But such matters are not on your mind,

For you’re trapped beneath

  her huge behind.